Ode to the Motorist (re: RANT)

Dear Motorist,

Hi! I see you coming down the road in your big ass pickup truck, spewing dust and debris in your wake. Hi! HI!!! Do you see me? It's ME! HI! I'm the one running towards you on the side of the road! Can you see me? How can you NOT see me in my magenta/pink/aqua running shirt and pink visor? Do you see me now? Ah! I take it from that barely perceptible nod that you DO see me! YAY! Ok. Good.

Well Mr. Motorist (and really this is gender non-specific), I was wondering something. Could you do me a favor? Please? PRETTY PLEASE? You see, I am running on the side of the road. Yes, I know I am actually IN the road a tad. Just a tad. But you see Mr. Motorist, there's no shoulder here on this road. I really am as over to the side as I can be. The edge of the road is quite dicey with the crumpled pavement and rocks and loose dirt. So I am over as far as I can be without running in this shit. And, sorry, but no, I really can't move all the way over and onto the grass so as to not be in the road at all. I knw this is an inconvenience to you, but, well, you see, running in the grass, while better for the body (joints and such), it is actually quite dangerous (rolled ankles and such). So no, I don't plan on running in the grass to get off the road, so that you can pass me with ease.

So, back to my favor, Mr. Motorist. I was wondering - if you wouldn't mind that is - could you please move your FUCKING GAS GUZZLING PIECE OF SHIT OVER TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROAD AS YOU GO PAST ME? PLEASE? I know it's a lot of trouble. I know you might not actually be able to move to the other side of the road due to oncoming traffic. I know. This is so inconvenient for you. I know it's difficult to just wait the 10 seconds or so for the oncoming car to pass so you can give me some room to run. I know you're in a hurry (although, by the brief look I get of you as you go roaring past with inches to spare, the only thing you have EVER hurried to is the McDonald's before it closes). But if you wouldn't mind, please, PLEASE, allow me some space to run on the road.

Because you see Mr. Motorist, I am not on this road, running in the heat, the humidity, sweating like a pig, huffing and puffing, and looking quite unattractive because I have a DEATH WISH. Really, because I don't. And I am not out here to make your life difficult. Honestly, I'm not. I can tell by the look you give me as you speed past that this is EXACTLY what you're thinking. But you are wrong.

So, dear Mr. Motorist, if you wouldn't mind, next time you come across me on the road, take a moment, as you drive by, chomping on your Big Mac, smoking your cigarette, in your air-conditioned fume-laden MOTORIZED vehicle, and remember one little, eensy-weensy, itty-bitty thing:

SHARE THE FUCKING ROAD WITH ME, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE.

Thanks, I really do appreciate it - and I can't wait to see you on the road again,

Sincerely,
FLAME

If I lose a nail it's APop's fault

ok, so my bad for starting this late. if the training schedule is 20 weeks long, I am already thru week 6. not that I haven't had much to report, but I just don't have time to do it. here's an effort to get back at it, considering both APop and K8 are blogging on their sites.

to catch up: I've been running pretty much full-on since mid April. since April 13 I have logged almost 150 mi, not counting this week's runs. for 14 weeks of training, already. you do the math (don't worry I already did - it amounts to about 11 miles a week).

yep, way ahead of where I was last year. fo' sho'. and mostly I have Team DaveShit to thank for it. That would be APop and K8. Plus, the first 2 months of running was a group effort - Jenny K, Lean, and APop - all running together at lunchtime along the river and such. Made such a diff. Then schedules got busy, the weather got jacked with heat and humidity, and I've pretty much been running solo for June and July. With a couple of runs thrown in for fun with APop. Intervals at the GRCC track at lunchtime, and a killer 8 miler on Kent Trails last Sat (a PR for her - BOO YAH!).

so now, in the thick of it. 14 weeks to go until the half on Mac I. gonna be a group effort this year. APop and the T-man (dude, you'd better get your ass on the road once or twice before Oct or you are in for a world of trouble), Lean and Matt (who I don't think has really committed to doing this yet, but considering Lean already booked the room at Mission Point, I guess he's shit outta luck), Jenny and Jeff K (back trouble? what back trouble?), me, and yep, my dad, who ran the GR half with me last year, and shall reprise his role as my running partner yet again for this half too.

as for training, wtf is with this weather. humidity is not my friend. it is trying to kill me. I've never sweated this much while running IN MY LIFE. and I do have a knack for sweating when running. this is taking it to a whole notha level. I'm even grossing myself out. rigoddamndiculous. one of these days I'm going to remember to weight myself before and after one of these humid runs. I bet I sweat off 5 lbs easy. how in the world is that possible?

did a hill workout today. w. t. f. daveshit. and on top of it all, the second toe on my left foot hurts. lots. I think it was all that toenail shit APop kept spewing the last 2 days - made me mental. now my toe hurts. if I lose the nail, I'm blaming her. totally.

on with the countdown. so far this week, besides the hill workout today I ran 3 mi as hard as I could without dying or feeling like I couldn't finish 3 mi. 26 min and change. not bad, but man, I really felt like I was moving, you know? and didn't even hold an 8:30 pace. how disappointing.

I need to get a grip.

Taking mah crazy pillz...NOW

Part Deux anyone?

October 23

Mackinac Island

13.1 hilly, scenic (did I mention hilly?) miles

ready freddy.

stay tuned...